Are you a hater?

OK, first off, I’m not going to use the word hate because I think it’s just too strong a word and there are very few things I can apply that type of energy to. How about intense dislike? Yes, let’s go with that. It makes a bad title though so I’m leaving that alone.

If you stuck with me (I’m writing this while battling some nasty cold germs.), you probably now want to know what I’m getting at. Fair enough. Here it is — is there a literary character you intensely dislike? One that will make you stop reading? Toss a book across a room? One that makes you explain, in detail, to random people on elevators, how awful this fake person is?

Mine — Emma Woodhouse of Jane Austen’s Emma.

Here’s why.  In easy to read bullet points.

  • She’s annoying
  • She’s spoiled
  • She’s frivolous
  • She gets up in everyone’s business
  • She doesn’t know when to shut it
  • She’s inconsiderate
  • She’s manipulative
  • She thinks she knows what’s best for others
  • She needs to focus on herself but she can’t
  • She’s self-centered (Yep, that goes against my last bullet — my point: she thinks she’s helping others when really all she’s doing is mucking up everything for everyone else. She sees herself as a savior of sorts but is a elephant barreling over everything and everyone.)

I’m going to stop there.

PLEASE, PLEASE don’t start with the hateful comments. I’m being hard on Emma but she’s not real people. NOT REAL! *deep breath* * prepares for comments*

I’ve read all of Austen’s novels (I think I’m missing a few short stories — Sanditon and one other.) and I love almost every one; my degrees of love vary but every book has something I have come to adore. I’ve read many several times. My favorite is one that doesn’t get much love and I’m good with that because we all like different things — I still ❤ you Sense & Sensibility! And I know there are many people out there that love and adore Emma, the book and the character. I just don’t. The character doesn’t offer me anything I can like and I want to like her. In fact, I’ve given her several chances, but she never comes around for me. I’ve tried to read the book numerous times but I never get through it. Last year, my most recent attempt, I made it further than I ever have but still didn’t see the end. And the movie with Gwyneth Paltrow, I couldn’t even finish that. My intense dislike of all things Emma is all pervasive.

Funny thing, my mom thinks Emma is hysterical. I don’t see it. She also thinks Sense & Sensibility is boring. On some things, we agree to disagree. My mom also intensely dislikes carrots. I don’t know how but she does. And no, that bit about carrots doesn’t matter at all but I’m just pointing out that it’s OK to disagree about things. It happens.

So, tell me your least favorite, most annoying, intensely disliked character. I know you have one. OR, convince me why I should give Emma one more try? I only have so many attempts left in me…

PS — If you tell me you intensely dislike Gandalf, I will find you and explain to you, in a detailed conversation, possibly in an elevator, why that cannot be. Kidding! Possibly.

PPS — That PS won’t happen. I don’t talk to people in elevators.

PPPS — I should not write blog posts after taking cold medicine. That is all.

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17 thoughts on “Are you a hater?

  1. Sooo…I’m not going to convince you to give Emma another shot. In fact (and this is harsh language coming from me), she annoys the piss out of me for all the reasons you listed.

    For what it’s worth, my favorite Austen is Persuasion. And who could hate carrots? 🙂

  2. I intensely dislike that chick from 50 Shades of Grey. (I don’t even remember her name.) Quite possibly the dumbest character ever written. And I only read the first 100 pages of the first book so I’m sure it gets worse. Great post. Thanks for helping me realize it’s okay to hate (intensely dislike) beloved characters!

    • It’s all good not to like everything.

      Ya know, I’ve made no attempt to read those books even though many have tried to make me. I have successfully resisted all attempts. My will is strong!

  3. I wouldn’t dream of trying to persuade you to like Emma. I will offer a tip o’ the hat to Ms. Austen, who made her characters so very real. I suggest that’s why you so revile Emma. She’s real, and you hate her.

    Yeah, me too.

  4. Hahaha, I’m totally in your mother’s camp. I’ve tried Sense and Sensibility thrice and have never come to love it, whereas Emma turned suddenly awesome on my third try and has since become my favorite Austen novel. I think I love it so much because I, too, am sort of bossy and nosy (though I hope not the way Emma is!), so I sympathize with her as a character. :p

  5. HAHAH! I love this post Amy!

    My hatefest was for The Book That Shall Not Even Be Named. It’s the only hateful review post I’ve ever done on Darkcargo.

    the main character there was just so… eh. Indecisive, whiney, etc. they were alcoholic college kids. WHY SHOULD I GIVE A CRAP?

  6. Pingback: A Thin Line Between Love and Hate: Top Ten Irritating Literary Characters | fourth street review

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